final crits, day 2
May 1. 2000

I had only one crit today, 2d, and I was really not worried about it. I was fairly sure I had an A, so I walked in there at 9 am, quite confident, only to find that my crit was at 9:30, not 9. So I felt like a major ass, slunk out of there and killed a half hour by first eating some breakfast and then staring mindlessly at the Montel Williams show on the big screen up in the lobby. All the while I felt my stomach start to churn and congeal around the food I had just eaten. God, what possesses me to eat such shit. Hash browns and Lucky Charms. No wonder I'm so huge.

The caffeine withdrawal is hitting me hard. Going on 3 days now. I've been getting horrible headaches and feeling generally sluggish. I've come to the conclusion that I was, in fact, addicted to caffeine. And I didn't even know it. Part of me rationalized, "well, I don't drink coffee or tea, so therefore, no caffeine!" all the while forgetting the two 16 ounce bottles of pepsi I consumed on an average day. Gah. I've been sleeping an amazing amount of time, and I still feel so tired.

But getting back to my crit. It was pleasant and low key, and I got an A. Which mean I am getting A's in all my studio courses *takes a moment to bounce off walls*. So I gather that will significantly improve my GPA from last semester. Rebecca said a number of nice things about my work, that not only I have a good sense of design, but I have something to say with it (once again. can someone please tell me what I'm trying to say with my art? I'd love you forever). She also said that I have a very distinctive style, which I can't see either, but I guess I'm not supposed to, because it's my work. She said my work was very dense and concentrated, but in a way that made it work. Sometimes I wish I could step outside myself and see my work like that.

I did get "How We Quit The Forest" by Rasputina over the weekend. Wow. I've haven't been this much into an album for a while now. So much into it I've been playing it non-stop since Sunday afternoon. It's pretty trippy, scary, wonderful music. I was then informed they had broken up, which pisses me off because the music is so damn amazing. I searched their stupid website for any information on the breakup, the newest information I could find was February 1999. As for fan sites, they are almost nonexistant.

I really wish this entry was interesting. Sorry. I must now come to terms with the fact that by writing this entry I am just procrastinating on studying for my Art History and Intellectual Heritage finals, on Wednesday and Thursday respectively. Those are my final hurdles. Friday afternoon Daddy comes down to help me pack up and then I'm blowing this joint.

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